Shattering the God's Within
Chapter 13
"From Wound to Worship"

"Worship is the bowing down of the whole person in adoration and wonder
to the Holy of Holies, the Almighty God, the Supreme Being, the Creator
of Life and the universe.  It is in accord with the commandment "You
shall have no other gods before me." (Duet 5:7)

"Of course. our greatest hindrance to worship is our own narcissism and
grandiosity, which drives us to worship projected images of ourselves
and create pseudo gods -- idols made in our own image.  By now we have
seen the importance of turning away from, rejecting, and shattering
those false gods.  But having done that, maintaining a clear perspective
of worship is not as easy as it seems."

"What is worship?  It is not some routine formality, ritual, or series
of actions.  Rather, it is a commitment that everything relating to us
-- situation, problem, emotion, activity, or person--will, in our hearts
and minds, be brought into subjection to God.

THE STORY OF KING UZZIAH
"Perhaps one of the most powerful pseudo gods in modern culture is
religion itself.  When we adopt this pseudo god, we lose the true
meaning of worship and accommodate superficial traditions which imply
worship but are totally void of spiritual reality."

"This is clearly illustrated in the life of the boy King Uzziah.  Uzziah
started his reign with deep understanding of worship.  However, at the
end of his life, he allowed the pseudo gods of power, materialism, and
success to destroy his relationship with God."

"Uzziah's faith was the core of his life.  He succeeded in everything he
endeavored to do.  His success increased his confidence and thus
counteracted his feelings of inadequacy and youthful inexperience."

We can read the story of King Uzziah in 2 Chronicles.  Dr. Allen goes
through it pretty thoroughly, but I will only hit the highlights.

"King Uzziah's success was unparalleled, and his fame spread far and
wide.  It was not long, however, before pseudo gods developed and he
began to bow to them. As we look at Uzziah's experience, we may review
the process of the making of a false god."

Seduction
"Success brought King Uzziah fame, riches and power.  Then, as now, that
combination is extremely seductive.  When we taste power, success, and
extreme confidence in ourselves, we create our own reality by seeing
what we want to see.  We are only aware of the positive aspects of our
activity, and we deny or rationalize everything else.  That produces a
kind of tunnel vision in our minds.  We start to believe that our fame,
power, and wealth will provide ultimate fulfillment.  Whether we look to
the past or the future, we allow ourselves to see none of the dangers
our pseudo god will bring to us.  The picture is 100 percent positive.
As a result, everything--and I mean everything-- is geared toward the
end of achieving more fame, riches, and power, or whatever it is that we
are seeking."

"At that point the pseudo god becomes larger than life and begins to
define who we are.  In King Uzziah's case, as he became more famous and
powerful, he was defined and identified by his fame and power.  That
process is exceptionally enticing.  Our personhood ceases to be a gift,
and we become dependent on what we have achieved.  As a result, we work
harder and harder to achieve more and more."

Exploitation
"King Uzziah worked more diligently; and he became stronger.  But before
long, he no longer had his fame and power--his fame and power had him."

"Before long, King Uzziah became dehumanized and lost his meaning,
dignity, identity and value.  When we allow ourselves to become
exploited by the pseudo god, we give our MDIV authority card over to it.
As a result worship and gratitude are no longer primary values.  That
leads to corruption, arrogance, and grandiosity."

Abandonment
"Arrogant, and with a misguided sense of power, King Uzziah became his
own god.  Here we have a man who was once godly, who committed his life
to worship and serve God, worshipping a projected image of himself--a
pseudo god.  In doing so, he lost the boundaries of holiness.  He became
puffed up with pride and unwilling to bow to the Holy God.  In his power
and narcissistic arrogance, he usurped the role of the priests.  He
decided that he,  not they should burn incense in the temple (2
Chronicles 27:16-18)."

"Uzziah's community, that is the priests who had been with  him
throughout his reign, tried to stop him, but he rejected their
intervention.  He had become his own authority.  And in the midst of
his rebellion and anger, his god was shattered.  Uzziah suddenly
developed the dreaded disease of leprosy and was driven out of the
palace.  He spent the rest of his life living as a derelict outside the
city walls."

The Shattering of the Gods
In the story of King Uzziah, we see the shattering of the gods within.
We see the shattering of the god of narcissism, that is, his pride, as
he tried to do things his own way.  "We see the shattering of the god of
conformity--Uzziah wanted to be like the priests rather than accepting
his own calling and situation.  We see the demise of the god of
materialism; as he became powerful and wealthy, he also became proud and
arrogant.  We see the breaking of the illusion of permanence, the
thought that  he could do anything he wanted and everything would remain
the same.  We see the worship of the extraordinary.  Even though he had
achieved ascendancy as a king, a warrior, and a statesman, he wanted to
also take on the role of a priest."

THE MEANING OF WORSHIP
"Isaiah, the Hebrew sage and prophet, recorded in Scripture that in the
year of King Uzziah's death, he had a vision of the Lord God.  Worship
is having a vision of the Holy.  According to Isaiah, his vision of the
Holy was "I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, lofty and exalted, with
the train of His robe filling the temple."  (Isaiah 6:1).  *****Despite
our religiosity, it is impossible for us to experience true worship
until our pseudo gods are shattered.  Perhaps that is why Isaiah's
vision of the Lord God came after the death of Uzziah."*****

"The vision of the Holy is essentially personal.  Worship requires a
personal commitment.  Often we tend to follow the crowd, listen to the
voices around us, or do the bidding of others.  But worship must be
centered in our own heart.  "Like the center of a bicycle wheel where
all the spokes converge, the heart is a metaphor for our center, where
all aspects of our life come together, social, emotional, spiritual, and
intellectual."

"Our heart is so often filled with the hurt and pathos of life that it
is hard to hear or see the vision of the Holy.  In order to develop a
vision of God in our hearts, we have to empty ourselves through our own
prayer life, through silence, through reading, through meditation."

"The Apostle Paul calls us to develop the eyes of our heart, so that we
can truly appreciate the grandeur and glory of God (Ephesians 1:18).
Worship alone allows us to develop the senses in the heart, for when we
see with the heart, we not only see, but we perceive God's presence.
When we hear with the ears of the heart, we not only  hear but we
understand His wisdom.  When we touch and feel with the heart, we
communicate and open ourselves to His love.  Worship involves the will.
It is a choice."

"Worship also requires individuation.  It is a coming away from the
crowd, listening, facing our awareness, awakening to life.  It is the
willingness to spend time hearing that still, small voice.  Worship
means becoming a missionary to our own lives, accepting who we are in
order to move into that which we can become.  It is seeing things as
they are in order to press on toward that which can be."

"Just as the problems of the world can only be solved by individuals who
acknowledge them, so the worship of God requires the personal commitment
to struggle and to be open to God.  This sense of individuation is
complex.  In one sense, as we come to know God, we feel the sense of
oneness and fusion with Him.  But in order for us to worship God,
differentiation must occur.  We have to realize that even though God is
in us and working through us, we are singular individuals who must
independently and freely choose to bow and worship before Him."

Worship:  Recognizing the Supremacy of God
"God is ultimate and infinite, whereas we are limited and finite.
Opening ourselves to God means that we are submitted to His Lordship, to
the specific revelation of His Son, to His Word and to His revelation
through creation.  It is worth repeating: "the core of worship is making
everything in our life bow before God."

Worship:  Seeing Beauty As the Handiwork of God
In Isaiah's vision the cherubim chant "Holy, Holy, Holy, is the Lord of
hosts.  The whole earth is full of His glory (Isaiah 6:3)."  The worship
of God is aligned with the vision of His glory or beauty on the earth."

"Worship settles our heart and allows us to see and hear the glory of
God on the earth.  Frederick von Schiller, the German philosopher and
dramatist, wrote about aesthetic education, saying, "Beauty alone
confers happiness on all, and under its influence every human forgets
that he is limited."  Interpreting Schiller's observations, some
philosophers claim that beauty is created out of the paradox between
freedom and destiny, finitude and infinitude, nature and spirit.  Thus
the worship of God allows us to face the paradoxes of life and
experience beauty in the world."

"Beauty erases all boundaries and distinctions and creates a common
humanity.  For example, after reading a classic book or seeing a great
film or play, somehow we feel that we have been listened to."  We feel
understood.  Or in the words of Rollo May, "Our loneliness is assuaged
and our hearts feel at home again."

"Many of us are so busy that we think we do not have time to appreciate
beauty.  In fact, our brains are so constantly programmed with bad news
and ugly phenomena that we repress beauty.  Then, when confronted with
it, our minds either ignore it or are thrown into cognitive conflict.
This conflict is demonstrated in the comment of a poet from New York.
Upon seeing the exquisite blue waters of the Bahamas for the first time
he became angry and said "I don't like it, its too beautiful!"

"Herbert Reed, the renowned art historian, reminds us, "It is not so
often observed that the same forces that have destroyed the mystery of
holiness have destroyed the mystery of beauty."  "How often in our
time-pressed schedules and burned-out spirits, do we pass unknowingly by
a lovely flower, fail to hear the symphony of the roaring tide, and
forget to see the glory of God in a baby's face."

Worship:  Experiencing God's Forgiveness
"In Isaiah's account of his vision, he reports that in the midst of his
helplessness and inadequacy, he is touched and forgiven.  He said, "Then
one of the seraphim flew to me, with a burning coal in his hand which he
had taken from the altar with tongs.  And he touched my mouth with it,
and said, "Behold, this has touched your lips; and your iniquity is
taken away, and your sin is forgiven" (Isaiah 6:6)."

"The vision of the Holy confronts us with our helplessness, but in so
doing we become the object of God's love.  The infinite reaches out to
the finite.  It is impossible for us in our limited, alienated
condition, to reach out to God.  But God's love continually reaches out
to us."  :We love," the apostle John explains, "because He first loved
us."  "He reaches us through books, people, circumstances, and nature.
But He specifically reaches out to us through His Word, the Old and New
Testaments, the teachings of the prophets, and of course His Son, Our
Lord, who is His love story to us."

"Confronted by His love and our  helplessness, we give ourselves to Him
and we experience new meaning, healing, hope, and forgiveness.  This
forgiveness does not create a different world, but allows us to see the
world through transformed, recreated eyes."

Worship:  Practicing God's Presence in Prayer
Isaiah reports, "Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, "Whom shall
I send, and who will go for Us?  Then I said, "Here am I.  Send me!
(Isaish 6:8)."

"In that brief conversation with God, Isaiah's vocation was defined.
Prayer is a form of communion with God.  Prayer is not just talking to
God; it is sharing His presence.  It is God's Spirit within us calling
us to communion with God Himself.  Prayer involves worship, meditation,
thanksgiving, and petition.  The challenge of prayer is to move beyond
mere intellectual exercise, into the prayer of the heart."

"In the prayer of the heart, prayer becomes like breathing.  It occurs
without ceasing, in our waking moments and in our sleep.  Praying in the
heart requires mediating on the love of God, facing our inner pain, and
releasing it to Him.  As the heart empties itself of its inner
woundedness, prayer then becomes its prime activity.  It results in
praying in the Spirit, exclaiming like Mary, "My soul exalts the Lord"
(Luke 1:46)"

Prayer characterized the life of Christ on earth.  The only thing the
Christ's disciples asked Him to teach them was to pray.  In a similar
sense, prayer should characterized the lives of all those who would seek
deep communion with the inner healing by God.  Prayer was the hallmark
of persons whose life purpose was to love and serve God in both the Old
and New Testaments."

The Prayer of the Heart
"Prayer is close communion between a person and god, the origin and true
Source of life.  Since God is omnipotent and omniscient, prayer links
finite human beings to their eternal source.  Thus Christ said that
people ought always to pray rather than faint.  Our Lord implied that we
have two choices in life:  either we learn to pray or we will be
overwhelmed.

"Prayer calms the heart and allows our problems to be put in proper
perspective.  The prayer of the heart is the quintessence of inner
healing.  The prayer of the heart develops the eyes of the heart, which
provide a deeper knowing, thus providing an eternal perspective."

"Prayer involves giving up our pain, our hurt feelings, our destructive
tendencies.  Prayer is emptying ourselves so that we can be filled."

God Prays for Us Within Our Hearts
"The most humbling thought is that God, through Jesus, is praying for
us.  Just before leaving them, Jesus told His disciples that He would
not leave them alone but would give them His Spirit to comfort and lead
them into truth.  Looking at that another way, we know that the Lord
left us His internalization to provide us intimacy with God.  That
involves the stability, consistency, and predictability we require for
emotional health.  Jesus comes into our inner void through His Spirit,
and prays for our healing.  "And in the same way the Spirit also helps
our weaknesses; for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the
Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words"
(Romans 8:26)."

"That puts prayer in a whole new light.  It means that prayer in the
heart is continuously directed by the Holy Spirit.  How meaningful it is
to think that, just as my family or friends pray for me, God is praying
for me in my heart.  His Spirit bears witness with my spirit that I am
His child."

"Prayer is opening our heart to the prayer of God, which is taking place
in our lives.  Because of the noise in our heads and around us, we
sometimes cannot hear the Spirit praying within us.  Perhaps that is why
we are reminded. "Thou wilt keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in
Thee." (Isaiah 26:3)."

Worship:  A Life of Service
"Isaiah said, "Here am I, Send me!"  And the Lord replied "Go!"
"The evidence of worship is not found in an experience of ecstasy.  It
is found in a heart given over to the service of God and one's fellow
human beings.  It is humbling to see how God ties His program of healing
to our own life, our wishes, and our decisions."

"Our call initially comes to our hearts; we are first sent to labor in
the mission field of our life.  We are sent to face our pseudo gods, our
giants, our helplessness, our broken families, our disappointed dreams,
our failures.  Once that process has begun, jGod's eternal love spreads
from our life to unite with His love in the world.  And in so doing, we
become a person who serves others."

Dr. Allen tells a story of an attorney who went through brokeness and
the shattering of his pseudo god, who now has a new sensitivity toward
hurting men and women in the inner city.  He now goes to a homeless
shelter in Washington DC often.  Dr. Allen says about this man,
"Brian saw the homeless men as part of himself, and he saw himself as a
part of them.  As a result God's love in his heart, he developed a love
for those men.  In fact, as his faith developed, the mission became his
second home, and those homeless men are now a part of his family.  He
has taken time from his busy and successful law practice to volunteer at
the mission.  Sitting with Brian at the mission, I was touched by the
impact he has had on men whose lives have been broken and battered by
suffering.  His love for them, mirrors God's love for us.  Truly, it is
an experience of worship.
"In a striking way, service is worship and worship is service."

Worship:  The Meaning of Life
"Worship is knowing God and enjoying Him forever.  Worship is shattering
our pseudo gods and making everything in our lives bow down to Him.
Worship is moving beyond our fears and woundedness, allowing ourselves
to fearlessly experience His love and then sharing that love with those
around us.  "The meaning of life is knowing God, receiving His
forgiveness, bowing at His feet, and having no other gods before Him.
Then, and only then, is it possible to worship Him with all whole heart,
our soul, our mind, our strength, and to love our neighbor as ourselves.