March 13th
MY TRIP TO PAKISTAN
March 13th
If I try really hard I can pretend to have had a good nights sleep. It is 3 AM and the sun is shining. I am in a Boeing 747 just about to land in London, England. It will be about 8:00 AM when I land in a few minutes. I'm on my way to Lahore, Pakistan, to visit with my husband's Azim's family. My husband was born in London, and raised between London and Lahore Pakistan. He is of Pakistani heritage. I have never been on this side of the Atlantic before so I'm pretty excited about the things I'll see and people I'll meet in the next three weeks. We've had a great flight, International flights have better service than domestic. We even got a dinner menu, real glass and real silverware. This flight is about 7 hours long . We will transfer in London at 10 AM onto Emirates Airlines for another 7 ½ hour flight to Dubai, a small country in the United Arab Emirates. It is in the middle of the desert. We will land at 9 PM . Time goes by so quickly on this journey. Hours seem like minutes, and they are, at least by the clock.
March 14th
The plane I'm on now is a 310 airbus. Inside the cabin, on three screens, is a computer image of the moving plane superimposed over a map of the area. It shows our progress in flight and the cities and countries as we approach them. I can see the local time in London, the present time, and the time in Dubai where I'm going. I can see the temperature, altitude and speed of the plane. We flew over The Black sea, GUESS WHAT ? ( IT WAS BLUE), the Mediterranean sea, Frankfurt, Germany, and Beirut, Lebanon. Right now we are flying over Damascus. Looking out the window it's pretty clear. I have a great view of the desert. All I can see is brown sand and rippled hills. It is covered in shades of purple as the sun is beginning to set. The computer screen shows we are west of Kuwait, south of Bagdad and far far south of Tehran. I can see on the image that beyond Kuwait lies the Arabian Sea, and Dubai. I looked for a few camels and tents down below, but not a one in sight. Oh Darn!! To me it's 10:30 AM, I do believe It's time to brush.
OH NO !! Right now I am just calming down from crying. I thought I was a goner. The most terrible thing just happened. The plane suddenly dropped about 25,000 feet in about 10-15 seconds. There were two falls in rapid succession one of the falls was 15,000ft. and one 10,000 ft. Everyone is pretty shook up, and there are lots of tears going on here. The pilot just apologized for the" tricky maneuver". He explained that two US Military jets were about to cross directly into our path and air traffic control told him to drop, NOW. So he did. Scared the you know what out of ME I'll tell ya!! I didn't think I'd have to worry about American mistakes on this flight.
12:30 AM. Dubai. We are in the airport ready, in one hour, to board for Karachi. There is a lot to see in this airport if you enjoy people watching. I had to go pottie, and to my surprise all the toilets are flat to the floor. Each stall has a hose in it that sprays water. No toilet paper? Do I stand or squat??? I chuckled about this one. Azim, says to get used to it cuz I probably won't see a "sitter" for 3 weeks, Muslims do not use paper for that purpose, they squirt away when they're done. Looks like I need to learn a few new tricks. We grabbed a burger, and sat and watched the people coming and going. There are people from all over the world here. The different styles of clothing and faces are very interesting. Women with clothes covering their entire bodies without more than a tiny slit for seeing, walking past girls with tank tops and bellies showing. Women and men in suits and tropical shirts, and others in soft white clothes that look like pajamas. Men in long dress like garments, women in jeans and women in Indian style clothing with bare midriff. A great fashion show for me.
March 15th Monday. We landed in Karachi at about 5 AM. We were delayed in customs. Under the pretense of searching our luggage the man obviously wanted to find out about me, our marriage and Azims ability to have his green card. Azim had to pay him a few rupees to let us go with no further delay. We were met by his "UMI" or cousin Kalsoum, and Aunt Shahanaz, who usually never leaves her home. I feel quite special to have brought her out today. Kalsoum brought me a beautiful greeting of red rose flowers. She never married, and lives with her mother because her father died many years ago. All the brothers have left home. The family owns several offices, shops, and a movie theater which is actually a live theater stage. Kalsoum takes care of all this and more for her mother. Azim says she is the same as any man in Pakistan with all she does. The car ride to their home was really fascinating. The rules for driving here must be ME FIRST! so WATCH OUT! They drive on the left. They make as many lanes as they need to get where they're going. The only thing I saw in regards to a speed limit was a sign that said "go slow". Now watch out for the three camels pulling carts on the right, and there's a donkey cart in the middle. Yikes!!! There's also three large oxen trailing behind each other on the left.. Intersections are really interesting. Everyone gets in the middle, honks their horns, and waits to figure out who has the easiest access to get out first. I really thought I was safe as a passenger in the car though, because I sure as hell wouldn't be safe as a pedestrian. The house is really huge, we have our own room with private bath. It is all marble. Surrounding the house, is a 12 foot high stone wall with 2 large locked gates. The back yard is the home of two cranes, a peacock, and a coconut palm tree. Azim spent a lot of time here as a child, and they seem so happy to have him here now. They don't really speak English, but I can sense they are also pleased to meet me and are happy that I'm here. Kalsoum has some limited English and the Aunt has none that I've heard as yet. Late in the afternoon we went with Kalsoum to visit Nurin. She is the wife if Ilyas, Azim's uncle in Lahore. She is in Karachi because her father died one month ago and she is staying with her family for 10 more days. We will see her in Lahore. It was rush hour and a lot of traffic. I got to see what it's really like here on my first adventure out. The ride was like the dodge em's at the fair. The city is really dirty, cluttered and littered. Tijuana, Mexico was cleaner, and more organized. Imagine that if you've been to Mexico. The shops and businesses don't look like shops or businesses, they almost look like old cement garages, filled with stuff. The apartment was 4 floors up above a marble cutters business. There were about 10-15 adults and 8-10 children in this small 4 or 5 room apartment. They were all happy to see Azim, and loved looking at me. They stared with much curiosity. After a brief visit we headed back to the house. We stopped at a store on the way. Several women and children came over to the car to look at me, and to beg for money. One lady tried to force my window open but I held it tight. There were kids pasting themselves to the front windshield and the side windows. We could hardly move the car to get out, and had to keep trying to get them off and get them away so we could move. We went into another area and got a kind of milkshake treat with fruit in it, then to buy bread. The bread is called "naan". There are different types of naan made with different ingredients. It is cooked in a stone pit oven in a well of coal or gas. The bread is flattened on a cloth-covered board and then slapped against the walls of hot stone. When it's done it just falls off and they pile it up to sell. I got out of the car to watch it being made. There were about 10 men and boys there around the store front, all WATCHING me watch. It was really an interesting experience. We had company for dinner, Azim's cousins and families. One cousin spoke English and they were all very nice. We had lamb, in a nicely spiced sauce, kebabs like a spicy hamburger with ground lamb, and Nan. Azim told me that his aunt and cousin really liked me. That was nice to hear. I really liked them too. They went out of their way to make me feel comfortable and happy. The funny thing was, I felt like his Aunt liked me because she kept trying to speak to me in her own language, even though I didn't understand. She tried to make me a part of each conversation. The look on her face was so hopeful, that by some miracle, I could understand her. After we ate, I got a chance to see some hand stitched material for making clothes. One of the cousins wives is a nurse and speaks English Her children were really beautiful and were nicely dressed in their hand stitched clothing. The dress of Pakistan is a "Chalwar Cameez" It is a dress like top to the knee, split on the side and a loose pant with many folds, and tied at the waist. The women wear a "Dupata" on their heads or when inside, around their neck and shoulder. There are many styles and materials and colors for both men and women. Men also wear pants and shirts, but many prefer not to. Karachi is in one of about 5 Provinces of Pakistan. It is in the Sindh province. They make a special cloth here that no other province has. It is hand stamped on the cloth in a repeating pattern in many colors. Really nice.
Tuesday, March 16th At about 4:30 in the morning I was awake and missing my waterbed. All over Pakistan they have this loud speaker system on the mosques. Someone goes to them 5 times a day and chants a kind of song. It is a call for everyone in the country that it is time to pray. The sun rises in the east and all of Pakistan rises with it. This call for prayer begins at about 4:30 AM, and Muslims begin the first of five prayer sessions for the day. At 9:30 AM we went out on another adventure. Azim wanted fish so since we are right on the Arabian sea we can get all we want. We just need to go to the fish market. We walked out the gate to catch a special bus into the city. The buses are the main public transportation. They are brightly painted in all different colors. They sort of look like the Partridge family bus company fleet. They are crowded with many people. No maximum capacity here, people were sitting on the roofs, hanging off the steps and on the bumpers. The vehicles travel close to each other too, not in feet, in inches. You could reach out of the bus window and touch the shoulders of the people on the bus passing you. Our bus was for the wealthier people. There was a sign in the front that said "ladies only" for the first several seats. Azim had to sit to the rear of this section and to get in, he also had to use a different door located in the back. The ride into the city was fun. I got to observe life on the streets. Each vehicle we passed, someone inside seemed to notice me and react. I feared for accidents, the way all the people strained themselves looking at me in a mass traffic jamb going into the city. I got a few laughs at some of the reactions. There was a lot of noise from horns blowing. We only traveled at 30 mph or so. They blow horns, not only to get people out of their way, but also as a warning that they are approaching, making it quite noisy. One car of men got mad because our bus was in front of them. The driver wanted to pass where there was really no room to do so. He kept honking at the bus, so after several minutes, our driver slowed the bus. They could yell at each other more easily then. Neither Azim nor I were prepared for the public reaction to me when we stepped off the bus. It was like Moses and the parting of the seas. During our two or three block walk, all activity stopped to let me pass on our walk to the fruit and fish market, and all eyes were glued to me as though I were Moses himself. Inside the market, it was worse. There are no bugs where we are staying, and I think it's because they were all at this market. It was crowded with men. Azim was looking mighty uncomfortable with all their eyes on me. Inside the fish market, it was dark, damp and smelly. There were 50 or more vendors with everything you can imagine for seafood. Kalsoum looked pretty comfortable for a woman in there. We stopped while she went along to all the vendors to get a good buy. I drew a crowd of men around me. If I moved, they moved and mostly right in my face. Several men said hello to me in English, I remained nervously quiet, smiling and nodding with a brief hello in return. Azim remained glued to me and held on to me very tightly. He hated being in there with me and was pretty nervous. I was really ok and felt somewhat in control, but realized later that it was because I was ignorant to my surroundings and he wasn't. After about ½ hr. most of them kind of got used to my presence and went about their business. Exiting the fish market we stopped at the fruit market to buy fruit and vegetables. Azim thought the prices they were quoted were high and Kalsoum confirmed they were. She attributed it to my being with them. Their thoughts were probably something like, American, must be rich! My being with them automatically brought up the price of everything. We shared a wonderful meal with Azim's aunt and cousins that evening. Shahanaz gave me a gift of 1000 rupees (rps) which is the name of their money to buy something for myself in Lahore. We are flying there tomorrow. I have really enjoyed my visit in Karachi.
2:00 PM Tuesday Right now we are in a plane on our way to Lahore. Azim is really excited about seeing the family after several years. He is sure they are all waiting at the airport for us. Only 1 ½ hrs. to go. Karachi was really nice. At the airport I got searched in a room by a woman. All women are searched because of the loose clothing as many men use this to use their women to transport illegal things. The arrival home in Lahore was really special. There were about 30 family, friends, and neighbors waiting to greet us with flowers, hugs, handshakes and tears. Each cousin came straight to me to greet me, hug me and shake my hand. It was really awesome. We piled into several cars for the ride home. The scenery was not unlike some places in America on the road heading into the city. There were more green trees it seemed than I saw in Karachi which was brown and gray. It appeared to be a little cleaner too. When we got settled, I packed all the gifts I had brought into shiny colored gift bags for each family. I brought lotions, shampoos, paper, books, crayons, pencils, pens, nail polish, hair scrunchees, toys, etc. Everyone was really happy getting all their prizes. The family is really large. There are three families living in this complex of two houses gated in together. Each house has two stories and an open flat roof. Built by Azim's uncle, Nawaz, and Azim's father. Both have passed away. Azim's Aunt Shamim and Nawaz, who is her brother, had raised Azim. Nawaz widow is Tasleem, she has 4 children. One son,. Khuram, in his early 20's, two teenagers Shumaila, and Humaira, and Rabia will soon be a teen herself. In the second house attached to this one by a patio only, lives Uncle Ilyas. His wife is Nurin (in Karachi right now,) His children are Benish , Asma, and Aisha all teen age girls, Danish although small will be a teen this year, and Zain, is almost three. The next uncle lives on the second level of the main house. His name is Mushtaq. His wife is Naheed. They have three kids, Imran, Amna, and Daniel. Staying in the house during our visit is Aunt Shamim and her husband Haiji Riaz, with their children, her young daughter is also named Rabia and Umer is her son. With Azim and I, there are 23 people that will be living here for the next 3 weeks. I'm adjusting to the bathroom, We have one next to our room and the family has been instructed that it's for our use only. It has a hand held shower and a big bucket to catch the water. Getting water is sometimes a wait. There is a cistern hanging on the balcony and a water heater. It runs out with all the usage so we gotta wait, or get up early. The sink and shower flow right out onto the floor and into a drain, there is a big tub, but it doesn't look like it has seen a lot of use, and the toilet is actually OFF the floor, but only by about 5 inches. My legs get sore using this method and I wonder what other disadvantage it has. I'll soon find out. I told Azim I really wanted "toilet paper" so I got it shortly after my arrival. I've been unpacking and getting settled in my room. The kids have been following me around as I go up and down the stairs. Rabia the 12 year old brought me her friends English book and soon I had 6 kids on my bed looking at it with me. They could read all the words under the pictures. I got a chance to learn their names and could see that they really don't know much English at all. I haven't seen the older girls yet. I understand they are pretty shy and I am sure that will be short lived. Later the kids took my hand to have me follow them. We went up on the roof balcony that overlooked the neighborhood and city. The sky was loaded with kites and I could see many people from all over the neighborhood on their roofs. We waved a lot, but shortly after the, I had to go down to the main floor to greet these neighbors, because after seeing me they were curious and asked the family if they could come to meet me. I received a lot of company. They shook my hand, smiled, giggled, stared awhile at me, and abruptly got up and left.. They came in groups of 7 or 8. Mostly teen girls and their mothers.
Wed. Mar 17th Today I got two Chalwar Cameez outfits on loan from Shamim, so I dressed like a Pakistani. It sure felt different. I was told that it is best that I dress that way in this country. All day people filed in and out of the house to look at me and shake my hand. I tried to nap but was interrupted to greet my company several times during the day. The kids also tapped on my door to visit. They are fascinated with my stuff. "What's this" they gesture. I knew I couldn't bring a curling iron because the plugs and outlets are different, so I brought curlers, they laughed at them. They tried all the sprays and checked out all my makeup. The kids followed me around all day. We made chains out of the construction paper, glue and glitter that I brought them. All afternoon and evening I was receiving a lot of young girls from the neighborhood and other neighbors brought me gifts. I got to see many different styles of clothing and became more impressed with their style. This is such a different culture. neighbors are closer here, and it seems they all know each other like it used to be years ago in the states. The houses are filled with entire families. When the sons marry the new wife joins the household, when daughters marry they move to the husbands family home. The neighbor got a new goat today and the little girls were talking to it. I watched from the balcony as the children played in the street. The boys were playing cricket and a few little girls were chasing each other. Young female children are allowed to play outside in front of their homes, but after a certain age all female children remain inside unless they are accompanied by their parents, or older brothers in a group of more than two. Older boys and girls are not supposed to be alone together.
March 18th
Thursday
Handmade cards by Benish.
Uncle Ilyas showed me his plastic address books and wallets that he makes on a machine in his house. Out side I can hear vendor's selling vegetables. It sounds as though they are calling out all they have to sell. The streets are dirt, part stone and brick. Beggars come and bang on the gates of the houses. Some ride donkey carts and travel with their family and beg, using a microphone. In the afternoon during my nap the older girls decided to visit me. There were 4 of them and Khuram their one brother. Azim went out with Hajji so I was alone. They sat on the floor in my room as they entered. It was uncomfortable at first, they didn't speak, just giggled and prodded each other to speak first. Finally I spoke to them and got their names and ages. Then we attempted to have a small talk in limited English. They were so cute and so nice. They brought me down to the patio between the 2 houses. Benish showed me some designs she made in college. She wishes to design cloth and greeting cards and she is really very good. She gave me a nice leaf print. and the card she designed here in the picture above.. Azim spent part of the evening just outside the gate talking with the friends he grew up with. We went over to his friends Bassit's to see his mother earlier today. They live across the road. We had a nice visit and about the time it was over I discovered that Basit speaks English. While the guys were sitting out on the stoop outside the gate later in the afternoon, I went up to the roof alone to look out . Down below I saw skinny wild cats and chickens running about, and children running and playing in the streets. I enjoyed the peace of the roof and my observations for about a half hour. I looked down below inside our gate and I saw Azim walking towards Uncle Ilyas house. I waved down at him, but he looked rather distraught. It seems no one knew where I was and were all looking for me. Freaked them out!! Hajji brought the cloth he and Azim chose when they went out today. I picked some I liked for clothes. The tailor is coming later to get my ideas and measuring for them. I'll have about 20 new outfits made. Mostly skirts and tops but also Chalwar Cameez's and pants. Later in the evening the older girls came to get me and we went up to the roof of the other house. I was called back after a while to the main house to meet more neighbors. Azim has spent 5 days trying to find me e mail. He said today that I should have it by Monday. I hope so. I've also been in the house a lot and need to get out, so Azim is planning to get his friend Happy to take us on a tour of Lahore. Everyone had a fit over the extremely high electric bill that came today. It was $635 rupees, about $12. I wish mine were that " high". You can get a lot for very little in American money here. $1.00 is 51.87 rps. Times have gotten worse for this family. Since Azim's uncle died , money is not as plentiful as it was when he was here. There are a lot of repairs to be made and Azim is taking care of a lot of family business and problems, which is part of the reason for our visit. He has become the main support for most of them.
Friday March 19th
Today, as promised, I got to go out. We took a cab that was really a motorcycle with a box type thing on it where up to three people can squeeze in, to the Bazaar where Azim went with Hajji yesterday to buy my cloth. The bazaar we went to is in the Old City of Lahore where the kings and most of the people lived in the 15 and 1600's. There are 12 gates, or stone arches, around the city to get in. Today it houses thousands of people and shops and the cloth market. I saw more different styles, colors and materials of cloth than one could imagine. This place was huge, part of it was recessed in the ground. The buildings are all stone, the streets narrow and uneven with a river of sewage running through it. Each merchant had a bench in front of his shop for customers to sit while he unrolled bolts of cloth to show . I picked out a few more and returned others from yesterday. After you are finished buying each merchant gives you a bottle of soda with a straw, it was like in the 1950's. We went to 3 or 4 out of several hundred shops. Along the alleyways between the shops, men were hunched over like animals carrying large loads of material. Others carried food for the workers. I saw an area where there were all different kinds of food being cooked. I guessed it was like the food court at the mall. NOT!! One boy saw me and followed us around for about 20 minutes so he could look at me. I felt pretty safe though cuz there were also a lot of men with big Uzi guns there too. They were in uniforms. Surely they would keep me safe. The ride gave me a general experience of Lahore traffic. Picture any Main street USA, now make 10 lanes of traffic in it. Donkey carts Horse carts, Ox carts, Motorcycles, Bicycles, The Pakistani version of a cab system our 3 wheel motor carts, Horse drawn "Tongas", Cars, buses, and pedestrians noise dust fumes and all scrambling around the dirt, brick, and even blacktopped streets. A scene out of a movie? This is real life in Pakistan. They all blow horns and yell and they all drive as if they were walking, weaving in and out of each other to pass. I was too shocked to be scared. I was thoroughly entertained. I couldn't believe my eyes. If I get used to it it's time to leave. It was a wild and crazy ride. All these modes of transportation riding or walking within one inch of each other. On the way home Azim said how much he appreciates all he has in America, and how sad he was that his family has only this dirty crowded, noisy, polluted city to face in their future, because they do not live in an area where life affords the luxury of a better environment.. He made me cry. I felt that too. We have so much to be thankful for.
The tailor came in the evening
for my clothing measurements, then we bought ice cream for
everyone tonight. I got to see some old family pictures and Azims
baby pictures. I showed off my purchases from the bazaar. Later
while Azim was talking to his friends outside, Rabia Nawaz came
to my room. I think she missed seeing me today, she is becoming
very attached to me as we hang out with each other quite a lot. I
made some games for the kids to play, cards, concentration, and
hangman. I taught them war, go fish and crazy 8's. . We have been
playing every day. Tonight I reached out and hugged Rabia for a
long time. I felt she was disturbed about something. She is such
a nice girl, I think I'm attached to her also. It didn't take long
to discover that she came to my room to ask if she would be able
to go shopping with me, all the older girls and Shamim tomorrow.
She has never been outside to the market to shop. I told her I
would tell Azim and that yes, she could come. That's when we
hugged. She was really excited about her first trip out to shop.
Soon the other kids came to find us, and we played games and took
a picture of ourselves with my camera. Rabia Nawaz holding my
chin, Imran and his sister Amna on one side and Rabia Riaz on the
other. A great self-timer group photo. We laughed a lot together.
Sat. March 20th
I laid in bed after breakfast today. I began to realize all the different sounds I am hearing and how noisy it is here. Listen, do you hear thunder in the distance, the birds chirping, roosters crowing, the housekeeper (squatting on her knees) sweeping with the Caribbean type broom of straw, kids playing on the patio, and in the street, the horns of the cars, and the horn of the balloon man.? The vendor carts are going by with men yelling out what they are selling, putt putt sounds are coming from the motorbikes, the neighbors goat is calling out, a baby is crying, there's a jet flying overhead. I hear Azim talking to his family downstairs, Soon the loud speakers will announce prayers from all the mosques for the second time. There are a few mosques here in this area and a different song on a different pitch comes from each one. Noisy Huh!! At about 1:30 everyone was all dressed up and ready to go on our big shopping trip. When I came downstairs, Azim was giving a lecture to all the girls on how to take care of me. He was very nervous letting me go out without him. They are told to walk in front, behind and on both sides of me with two holding my hands at all times. Rabia just grinned. She was excited about going. No one told her how to behave. We got into the Tonga, a horse drawn cart. 4 facing front and three facing back. Rabia was in front behind the horse's tail. The shopping place was really crowded and the girls were very nervous about me. They saw how people reacted to my presence. They were bound to protect me. I was now used to it and they weren't. They were uncomfortable and couldn't even concentrate on looking for things for themselves. I had a ball and bought 3 outfits. Shopkeepers were nice and showed me many things. After shopping in the crowded market we went for ice cream, then bargained a price for another Tonga ride back to the house. It was crowded on the streets and at one point, some jackass (literally) crossed our path we had to stop to let it through. As we did, the horse's head in the Tonga behind us came right into our space about a second from the girls faces. They jumped and yelped. It was funny. I wish I could come up with the exact description of the traffic, but it's beyond imagination. The street smells of animal, exhaust and food, the air is thick with dust and pollution. The sheer red Dupata on my head made a good face cover outside from the dust. Azim was so relieved to see me when I returned. I took a most needed shower then went to bed exhausted and a little early, closing out my first week.
To continue my story of my visit to Pakistan, click the link below and it will take you to week two.